It's hard to conciliate pleasure with work. Fortunately I chose a profession I like, but there are lots of different areas to exercise. Sometimes I find myself completely divided. Before choosing my college course, I knew that I was good with numbers but what I loved was literature. My math and physics marks were great but I didn't like to study them very much. My grammar was usually terrible but I loved to study figures of speech. Maybe not terrible, but it could be better. Later in college my best marks were related to math, calculus etc. and not to subjects related to computer science like architecture, networks, databases, software engineer and so on. Anyway I have never failed in a subject, my final scores were always blue. But it didn't change the fact that it was weird to me not to get good grades on the subjects I liked. Some other oddities are like not been good at things most people are and been good at things most people aren't. The fuzziness, the opposites, the swapped sense were always present in my life. It challenges me. Of course that there are things that I am good and love, and things that I am terrible and hate. And it is hard to explain these concepts to people, it's hard even for myself to understand.
I need to manage my skills with my actions, my natural talents with my experience. It is wonderful when I have direct contact with someone who can work with this never ending twist in my head. Its not like I cannot manage it alone, but it makes me really happy to find someone who can complete my thoughts. Sometimes I have lots of ideas and brainstorms and there are people that can synthesize these ideas. This makes me happy because it means that this one person understood me. And it feels good to be understood. I can both complicate and simplify, but I have more fun complicating things because it pushes my creativity and allows me to explore more of myself. So its natural to me to appreciate people who can take the best of what I can offer.
